Tag: eating disorder recovery
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It’s OK to feel overwhelmed
I have a big week coming up. It’s Time to Talk Day on Thursday 4th February. My poem “First Steps” is being published. I’m speaking at an online event. A blog I wrote is being published locally. I should be excited, right? No, I’m overwhelmed and anxious. I’ve managed to self-sabotage by over-exercising, triggering my…
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The BED Post blog is a year old
November 2020. A global pandemic. Dark evenings. Boredom. And I decided it was time. Time to tell my story, on my own terms. Time to take what I had learned challenging stigma as a mental health champion in the real world. Time to face my fears and go online. I googled “how to start a…
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Lessons in love
The thing about recovery, and stopping eating disorder behaviours, is that it brings stuff up. It leads you to re-evaluate your life, the life lived in the shadow of an eating disorder. It makes you question everything, especially if you had an ED for a long time, like me. How much was my life shaped…
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O***y Day, weight stigma, and triggers
Content warning: eating disorder and intrusive thoughts. I’m going to start by saying how grateful and happy I am to have found the online ED recovery community. I have learned so much from being a part of it, and have been at times overwhelmed by the welcome and support I have received. However, there have…
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Well, this is a lot!
After two years of lockdowns, isolation, boredom, and self-reflection, it suddenly feels like someone’s pressed the fast forward button on my life. As if I’ve gone from zero to 100 overnight. So many amazing things have happened over the last few weeks! I’ve got a new job. The Instagram and Twitter accounts are doing better…
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The Day the Music Died
TW: eating disorder feelings and behaviours. I met him one drunken night in my favourite bar. He was there to play a short acoustic set and afterwards, we got chatting. About music, life, the usual drunken things. I gave him my number and a few days later, he called and asked me out. Not long…
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Avoidance
It’s been a few weeks since I last wrote a post. I’d convinced myself that I’ve been too busy. And it’s true, a lot has happened since I visited my parents. I’ve started a new job, which has meant a lot of new things to learn. I’ve started physiotherapy, and been diagnosed with fibromylagia. I…
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Eating as an act of rebellion (or you can’t smash the patriarchy on an empty stomach)
My food intake was controlled as a child. It wasn’t as simple as being a chubby kid who’d been put on a diet. There was more to it than that. There always is. There were times when money was tight, and food had to be stretched to the next pay day. I was apparently a…
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Feeling fat
What feeling “fat” meant for me when I had an eating disorder: 1/ I felt physically bloated because: 2/ I was feeling ashamed, guilty and hating myself because I’d binged, purged or both, and was taking it out on my body. 3/ I was struggling to deal with difficult emotions completely unrelated to my eating…
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A Family Christmas
Those of you who follow me on Instagram will know I’m in Australia at the moment. I’m here staying with relatives. Later this week, my parents will be joining us, and I will be celebrating my first family Christmas since I began my recovery journey. Christmas isn’t actually the reason I’m here. I travelled all…