The BED Post

The Binge Eating Disorder Recovery blog

Silence

I thought I’d learnt to trust you
That love would set me free
But how could that be possible
When I was hiding an ED?

Concealing frequent binges
Fat, disgusting, greedy me
How could anybody love this?
A woman hiding an ED

My dirty little secret
I couldn’t let anyone see
The fat pig living inside me
So I kept hiding my ED

I said I’d leant to trust you
I was lying to you and me
Because I couldn’t really trust you
If I was hiding an ED

Was it you I never trusted?
Or was the lack of trust in me
Too scared of being vulnerable
To stop hiding my ED

Our relationship never stood a chance
How could you truly ever know me
When I hid all that self loathing
With my binge stashes and ED

No, you never really knew me
And there’s no-one to blame but me
I couldn’t bring myself to trust you
Enough to tell you about my ED

So now I’m speaking loud and proud
About you, my ED and me
In the hope that someone listening
Trusts someone enough to disclose their ED

If you’re worried about your relationship with food, don’t suffer in silence. Please tell someone close and your GP.