Heart racing, body trembling,
Light headed, dizzy, gasping for air,
Red faced, filled with shame,
Fear: of everything,
Of failing,
Of feeling this way forever.
My counsellor told me
Shaking legs will hold me up.
So I stand, take a tentative step.
I don’t fall,
So I take another,
And start the hardest journey I will ever take.
You think Mental Illness means I’m weak?
Then you have never known
The strength it takes to walk
On shaking legs.
To exist,
Because living is too much for now.
I don’t want to just exist.
I don’t want to feel this way forever.
So heart racing, gasping for air,
I stand on shaking legs,
And take my first steps
Towards a new life.